Harvey Dent’s Watchful Guardian… Yet Two-Face Still Rises

This is not my long awaited geek-tastic anaylsis of Harvey Dent (likely to be titled “Decent Men In An Indecent Time”) that I have promised (that will appear on Breaking Geek anyways…), but rather a continuation of my using Harvey Dent and Two-Face as a metaphor to chart my progress with my addictions, including sleeping and spending money.

After Thursday night’s post, I was ready to go full Two-Face, sleeping until work at 3pm, keeping myself from achieving my full potential, just as Harvey Dent was corrupted by the monster inside: transformed from a symbol of hope into a cop-murdering lunatic (not quite on the same level, but where is a geek without comparing his mundane life to comics and movies?).

Yet, there was a watchful guardian who got my day on the right track. My own white knight (who I assume is less easy to corrupt than Gotham’s).

My best buddy Andrew arrived noonish to pick up applications from an open house I looked at. Planning on giving him the apps and returning to my slumber post haste, I didn’t even put on a shirt, exposing my pale Gollum/Schindler’s List bod.

But my white knight had my best interest in mind, he had just read “Ripe For Inception” and stuck around just long enough for me to wake up completely and not return to bed.

Today, I was similarly lucky. Though I left my phone (aka alarm clock) down stairs in my Captain America jacket pocket, my father awoke me at 12:30, which when compiled with my 4am bedtime, made for the closer-to-8-hours of sleep my body needs (as opposed to the 16 I usually give it).

Regrettably, he woke me so we could go to the Tattered Cover, and we all know what happens when I go to the store (I buy frivolous shit).

I only bought a mother’s day present… plus three books for me… “Avengers: The Origin,”Pawnee, The Greatest Town In America” (behind Aurora), and “How To Archer: The Ultimate Guide to Espionage and Style and Women and Also Cocktails Ever Written” by Sterling Archer.

Hence, my Two-Face day. Like a good Harvey Dent, I slept less than 9 hours, worked out, and read my new anxiety book (the reason for the trip to the Tattered Cover)… but the monster inside lead me to buy 3 books (to be fair, two were by my favorite fictional authors, Leslie Knope and Sterling Archer).

In having a mostly Harvey Dent day, I finally completed my 30 Days of healthy behavior (sleep less than 10 hours, exercise, read anxiety book), earning me my shield!

Well, the original agreement was that my parent’s would bribe me to “be an adult” with a plastic Captain America replica of his movie shield, but when the Broncos aquired the greatest quarterback in the history of the NFL and TV commercials, I instead decided I wanted a Peyton Manning jersey.

Don’t worry, Two-Face and I already bought the shield a month ago from Mile High Comics.

Me with my jacket (Christmas gift), Shield (month old purchase), and Captain America mask (this week purchase). I may have finally crossed the line between geek and crazy obsessive.

So, off to Sports Authority we went, and my Peyton Manning jersey was secured, in all its orange glory. Only a hundred clams… brought to you by my lovely parents.

It’s tragic that this trip required walking through a Barnes and Noble, where again Two-Face reared his ugly head. While looking for a book on dealing with the loss of a pet (another reccomendation of my psychiatrist, just like the anxiety book), I found B&N’s Avengers table.

Big mistake.

This time I only bought one book (because the other graphic novel on the table was the very same “Avengers: The Origin” I bought at Tattered Cover), Marvel’s “Civil War,” the last great event in the Marvel Universe preceding the current “AvX.”

I almost bought a Captain America bobble-head as well, but Harvey Dent prevailed.

The experience has brought me to the following conclusion; in order to not spend money I need to stay out of stores… and off Amazon… and Ebay… really, any website that sells anything from porn to digital music (Did I mention Two-Face preordered the new Tenacious D album on iTunes this week?)

So, that sums up my last two days, one a total Harvey Dent, and the other more Harvey with a big ole’ pinch of acid face.

While I’ve got you here, I’d love to bitch about the impending Avengers movie. At AMC (where I work), we just got two new songs added to our CD that repeats every ten or so minutes. Both songs are from The Avengers soundtrack, Avengers Assemble.

Too bad both songs are shit. Especially “Live to Rise” by Soundgarden. Terrible theme for what will hopefully be a better movie.

They would have been better off with the theme from the Disney XD show, Avengers: Earth’s Mightiest Heroes.

And that’s all I have for tonight. Thanks for listenin’ doc.